well, another year has passed, and im finally back for prayerwalk. in case some of you guys dont know, its a yearly event held by maranatha prayer ministry which involves visiting of people's homes and praying with them. this is like, my 3rd year going, i think. in any case, it was good spending time with the mpm peeps, though i felt so.. ahh, oh wells.

during the travelling, and the visiting, an odd thought crossed my head. i was thinking about how much i enjoyed teaching, and how much i missed the children i used to teach at little skool house sgh and learning vision kkh. i thought about how much they could have grown, and how much progress they might've had since the time i last saw them. it occurred to me that seeing children grow and develop made me very happy. the thought of being with them each and every step of the way, helping them grow made life very fulfilling for now. but now, im no longer in that profession, for i have decided that i wanted to take a step into the media industry. the very industry that faces so much competition and politics. the very industry that literally supports the statement, 'to each his own'. this got me thinking..
can i bear to be selfish and fight for what i want? or am i the kind that wants to be part of the nurturing process? i cant help but wonder. gosh, i've always believed that i would enjoy the media a whole lot more, seeing that early childhood was something that i happened to chance upon, whereas the entertainment industry was something i'd always wanted to be a part of. i mean, i still do want it, but what am i destined to do? grr. cant help but think, think, think. oh wells.

in any case, i look forward to tomorrow. i look forward to the weekly late night chats, where i can freely speak my mind. but.. do i say too much sometimes? when does anyone know when to stop? hmmm. i used to think that as long as i believed in whatever i said, i didnt have to bother about what others thought of me. but now when i see things presently, i feel that other people's opinion of me is so important. i take everything in, and i act accordingly. but when people choose not to say what they truly feel, i find myself second guessing. and gosh, that sure is a tedious process. sigh, nothing much i can do about it anyway.

alrighto, i'd better get to bed soon.. need to wake up early to help rowen with her centre's concert full dress rehearsal. hopefully... i can wake up in time. haha, im not accustomed to early mornings. yawn.